I can’t wait to move to a place where everyone’s fancy, thin, and pretty. Where I totally, CANNOT pull off wearing head-to-toe spandex. Where I feel fat, ugly, and out of place.
Most days, I purposely make myself look as ugly as I humanly can. Other days, when nobody will see me or I’m going out of town… I wear nice clothes and make-up. It’ll be frickin’ awesome to feel like me again, without having to be fat or dressing like I pulled my clothes from a trash dumpster. 😁🍹
When my son and I spent time at the park in Concord, NH, we were in an upper middle class neighborhood. Mom’s were thin and pretty. I was the fattest and ugliest one there. We all were wearing the same clothing style (head-to-toe spandex athletic wear and a short-length, light-weight cardigan.) I was the oddball out though.
Recently here, I wore the outfit. I felt terribly uncomfortable.
In Concord, I felt normal again. I felt like me, and haven’t in at least 20 years. There, I felt happy and safe. Not like a piece of meat. I can’t wait to feel that safety and freedom all of the time, and not make myself unhealthy or miserable while trying to find it.
Perfectly Human 
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